Episode 11: The Collection
Original Airdate: November 23, 1991
Written By: David Ehrman
Directed By: Don Lusk, Paul Sommer (Supervising Direction by
Ray Patterson)
At a tall, mysterious castle on a tiny islet, a small,
flying creature called Ratmore returns to his master, the magician Garen. They
are apparently located close to Jandatown, as they leave the castle, soon to arrive
at Zoolie’s game house, where the crew of the Wraith chats with their ally.
Zoolie warns his friends to avoid the Straights of Hedrin,
where many a ship has been lost. Ren insists it’s the only way to go, as the
compass points in that direction. Niddler asks a question that’s vexed viewers
from the earliest part of the show: “Why don’t we go after another treasure?”
Indeed – why not? Garen interrupts any potential answer to this poser as he
demands his dinner from Zoolie. Ratmore picks on Niddler and Zoolie explains
who Garen is to the crew. Ioz notices a pirate named Scorrion who he feels
cheated him, causing a scene. Swords are drawn, which is in direct contrast to
BETRAYAL, where weapons were not allowed in Game House. Ioz backs down, being
outnumbered. Garen leaves, having overheard the whole dispute, planning
something unscrupulous.
Ioz complains about having lost treasure to another pirate
as he returns with the others to their ship. Ren and Tula turn in for the
night, but Ioz talks Niddler into helping him infiltrate Scorrion’s boat. A
quick distraction gets Ioz aboard to find a large, seemingly unprotected
treasure hoard. Scorrion is not unaware of Ioz’s presence and sails out to open
water. Niddler returns to the Wraith to tell Ren, who chases after the pirate
vessel.
Scorrion and his crew confront Ioz, who charges through them
to get to the main deck. Ratmore flies above, placing an amulet in the crow’s
nest for some unknown purpose. Ren spies Ratmore leave the nest just before Ioz
is recaptured by Scorrion’s pirates. A green beam of light strikes the deck of
Scorrion’s ship, surprising his crew and Ioz, and then a green mist surrounds
the ship. Ren and the others watch in horror as the pirate ship disappears.
Garen peers into a bottle as Scorrion’s ship materializes in
it, now the size of a model. Strangely unfazed, Ioz and Scorrion put aside
their dispute to demand why Garen has taken them. The magician egotistically
shows off his collection of ships-in-a-bottle and the treasure he’s taken from
them, demanding Scorrion give up his hoard. With the pirate’s refusal, Garen
seals a stinger insect in the bottle to scare them into giving it up.
The Wraith docks at Garen’s keep, with Tula explaining that only
a magician could have made Scorrion’s ship disappear as it did. Regular viewers
scratch their heads at this bit of conjecture, waiting to see where the plot
jumps to next.
Inside the bottle, the insect is wreaking havoc with the
pirates. Ioz and Scorrion prevail against the bug, causing Garen to lose his
temper. He takes the bottle to his Mutarios, creatures with large mouths and
short tempers. He shakes the bottle over their mouths, terrifying the pirates.
A knock at the door has Garen putting aside the bottle, giving the prisoners
time to form an escape plan.
Ren has come to Garen’s keep in disguise as an herb peddler.
Garen isn’t overly impressed or deceived by the disguise, recognizing Ren from
Game House. Even so, he is interested in the offered herbs and leaves Ren to
get money. Ren noses around the keep, followed by a complaining Ratmore. He
discovers the ship collection and feigns interest in model building techniques
when Garen returns to pay for the herbs. Ren is escorted out and Garen sends
Ratmore after him with another of the magical amulets.
Scorrion and his pirates are gathering their treasure onto
the deck of their vessel, with Ioz included in one of the trunks. Scorrion
doesn’t trust Ioz, but none of his crew is brave enough to attempt the escape
plan. Garen comes back to the room before the argument can finish and is
pleased to see the treasure is being handed over. Garen uses long tweezers to
remove the trunks from the bottle, ensuring the success of the escape plan.
Ratmore flies over to the Wraith as Ren talks to Tula about
the collection of ships-in-a-bottle. Tula “senses something”, a continuing
theme of the show, with Niddler discovering Garen’s servant. After a short
melee, the green mist surrounds the Wraith, ending with it being bottled, too.
Garen places his newly gained treasure in the room with the
rest of his stolen booty, re-enlarging it and leaving it to rest for the night.
Ioz steps out of the chest, overhearing Garen remark that none of the bottled
pirates will last the night, with their bottle sealed and the oxygen running
out. Ioz discovers he’s locked in the treasure room, ruining his planned
escape.
Ren and Niddler push fruitlessly at their bottle’s cork,
until Tula utilizes her powers to heat the air and pop it out. Ren climbs out,
looking for Garen’s enlarging potion to return them all to size. Meanwhile, Ioz
pushes a loose stone out of the wall of the treasure room, climbing through to
the outer wall of the castle. He climbs up the wall to an open window, crowing
to himself over all the trouble he’s gotten himself into.
Ren and the others try to free Scorrion and his men, with
Niddler accidentally flinging himself into the Mutarios’ cage. Garen enters the
room, awoken by the racket, noticing the crew of the Wraith has escaped.
Ratmore is given carte blanche to find and dispose of them, so Ren causes a
chemical fire before Ioz pops in and attacks Garen. The magician uses a freeze
powder on our heroic pirate, so Ren releases the Mutarios, who also attack
Garen and knock him out another open window. Ioz recovers and tries to help the
others, but the enlarging potion gets caught in the fire and explodes. Ioz has
Ren and the others get back into their bottle, grabbing it and the one with
Scorrion’s ship. Another explosion has Ioz drop the Wraith’s bottle before he
can get out, cracking it. The enlarging mist fills the bottle, so Ioz takes a
chance and shatters it, returning it to full size and back on the water. Now
aboard the Wraith, Ioz then breaks the bottle with Scorrion’s ship, freeing it
as well. All watch as Garen’s castle is burning and wracked with explosions.
All around the Pirates of Dark Water, unmanned ships start appearing. The
trapped vessels have been freed by the explosions. The Wraith continues on the
quest, leaving Scorrion to salvage the ships for treasure.
Noy Jitat! At least one new bit of the language of Mer
pops up in the beginning of the episode, with Ratmore using ‘chopanga’ to
describe something. Or curse about something. It’s amusing how most of these
words can be used for multiple meanings. ‘Dingamord’ is used by Ioz to
infuriate Scorrion, at well.
Mutant Scum –
Garen is some form of green mutant, nearly fantasy troll- or goblin-like in
appearance. The orange cape really makes the man-mutant, though. The Mutarios
are grown from test tubes and Ratmore calls them “fungus”. Mer has some fun
critters. In fact, the mutarios look just like the Crites from the Critters
series of movies.
When Do We Get to
Eat? Niddler is tempted into Ioz’s scheme with food, and he eats quite a
bit of Scorrion’s ship supplies before being discovered. He’s a good melon seed
spitter, too.
Ahoy, Skarpango
Pirate! Welcome back, Zoolie. We missed you. Greetings Scorrion, you
no-necked, red-headed Mongol. With no teeth. And bad clothes.
Oh, THE COLLECTION. What great memories you have. Rewatching
this episode was going to be fun, I thought. I remembered so many cool things
about it but sadly, it doesn’t hold up. Garen’s demise is moronic, the lack of
any of the pirates from the Maelstrom is a bad decision here and Scorrion and
his lads just don’t hold up to Ioz. The idea of the collection is pretty cool
but the eventual dismissal of the remaining ships and fate of their crew is
simply poor scripting and characterization. Fleshed out, this could have been
something great but it’s just trapped in a 23 minute schedule and suffers for
it. 2 and one half minga melons is all I can give this.
Apologies for the delay in the rewatch. Back on track
shortly.
